[Well, he might as well go. He's already become aware that he's losing control - small flickers in his physical form, a sense of something slipping in the back of his mind - but he's got no reason to think Amanda knows why he'd be reluctant to go up on deck. This once, with her, he can risk it. So in ten minutes he's emerging onto the deck, hands in pockets, casual as anything.]
[Adam exudes calm. This situation's too far gone for him to bother pretending he's afraid of that implication - the games she plays wouldn't work brilliantly on an entity that doesn't really have a body so much as it convinces everything around it that it does.]
Of course I haven't. I'm proud to continue John's work.
[There's the trace of a smile at those words, but she's too angry and frightened to look smug.]
What you may not know is that in order to select my test subjects, I keep extensive handwritten notes on every single person aboard. The funny thing is that when I went through them earlier today, I noticed that people's behaviors...aren't quite matching up to my recorded observations.
[She takes a step towards him.]
I also noticed that you're the only one on this entire ship without an entry...and I don't overlook anything.
Care to explain? Oh, while you're at it--maybe you can tell me about Jill Tuck. I seem to have written a lot about how she was like a mother to me, but I don't know who the hell she is.
[He puts a hand to her shoulder and his smile vanishes. Her memory opens for him and it's simplicity itself to find what's most vivid, most treasured - to obscure everything except the knowledge that it's gone.]
[She shrugs his hand off her shoulder and glares at him, as if to say why do you care?]
He was my father. I remember--
[And she goes silent, absolutely horrified, as it hits her: she can't remember his appearance, or the sound of his voice. She remembers pressing her face to his cheek as he suffered in his bed, but the memory of his smell is likewise missing. All the blood drains from her face, leaving her pale as a corpse.]
You--!
[She lashes out, grabbing his collar to yank his face down to the level of hers. Naked terror dominates her expression.]
[He grabs her wrists, his expression cold and hard.]
Right now, Amanda? I am doing you the kindness of even remembering he exists. If you breathe a word of this to anyone, if you even think about crossing me, I will destroy you. I will eviscerate your memory. You will never have met him. You will be the worthless, meaningless pile of human trash you were before he found you.
No! Leave me that one, please, oh god please don't take it away!
[She can feel it vanishing and bursts into frightened, desperate tears.]
I swear on my fuckin' life, so give him back to me! ALL of him!
[She feels herself growing dizzy with sheer terror over what he could do to make this worse, and her knees buckle. She has to grab his wrists to stay upright.]
[He lets the next few seconds stretch out, revelling in the rush of power, the kick he gets from knowing how swiftly and how utterly he can reduce a woman of such alleged strength to a frightened mess. He thinks about just doing it anyway - slicing away her memories, leaving her too helpless to utter a word against him - but it's more fun this way. It leaves him stronger.
He kisses her forehead fleetingly and lets the memories rush back in.]
[The return of memories causes her entire being to flood with relief, and she falls to her knees, body drawing in on itself as she weeps freely. She's far too traumatized to feel shame.]
Oh god, John...
[She still doesn't know who Jill Tuck is, and at this point doesn't dare ask. She can't risk losing anything of John again.]
Private
Private - I figure we can just spam here
Meet me on deck in ten minutes or I'll find you myself.
Spam - we can!
Spam
You know what it is that I do, don't you? Of course you do. Everyone does.
[She's working up to the accusation, seeing if she can catch him off-guard.]
Re: Spam
You've never exactly been secretive about it, eh?
Re: Spam
[There's the trace of a smile at those words, but she's too angry and frightened to look smug.]
What you may not know is that in order to select my test subjects, I keep extensive handwritten notes on every single person aboard. The funny thing is that when I went through them earlier today, I noticed that people's behaviors...aren't quite matching up to my recorded observations.
[She takes a step towards him.]
I also noticed that you're the only one on this entire ship without an entry...and I don't overlook anything.
Care to explain? Oh, while you're at it--maybe you can tell me about Jill Tuck. I seem to have written a lot about how she was like a mother to me, but I don't know who the hell she is.
Re: Spam
I'll do whatever you want, Amanda. But before I do, maybe you could answer a question for me.
Re: Spam
And what would that be?
Re: Spam
What do you remember about John?
Re: Spam
He was my father. I remember--
[And she goes silent, absolutely horrified, as it hits her: she can't remember his appearance, or the sound of his voice. She remembers pressing her face to his cheek as he suffered in his bed, but the memory of his smell is likewise missing. All the blood drains from her face, leaving her pale as a corpse.]
You--!
[She lashes out, grabbing his collar to yank his face down to the level of hers. Naked terror dominates her expression.]
WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO ME?!
Re: Spam
Right now, Amanda? I am doing you the kindness of even remembering he exists. If you breathe a word of this to anyone, if you even think about crossing me, I will destroy you. I will eviscerate your memory. You will never have met him. You will be the worthless, meaningless pile of human trash you were before he found you.
Re: Spam
Give them back! They're MINE! I won't say anything, I swear to fuckin' god, just GIVE HIM BACK TO ME!
Re: Spam
You swear, Amanda?
Re: Spam
[She can feel it vanishing and bursts into frightened, desperate tears.]
I swear on my fuckin' life, so give him back to me! ALL of him!
[She feels herself growing dizzy with sheer terror over what he could do to make this worse, and her knees buckle. She has to grab his wrists to stay upright.]
Please...!
Re: Spam
He kisses her forehead fleetingly and lets the memories rush back in.]
Re: Spam
Oh god, John...
[She still doesn't know who Jill Tuck is, and at this point doesn't dare ask. She can't risk losing anything of John again.]